Best New York Comedy

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Lisa Lampanelli tells tales of online dating at Risk!...

...while Jessi Klein performs stand-up at Lasers in the Jungle

Tonight’s recommendations for the best in New York City comedy (in chronological order, with top picks noted and shows over $10 marked with $) include:

[FREE] 6:00 pm: Open-mic stand-up with comics drawing names from a bucket, with each chosen one receiving three minutes at The Creek’s upstairs theatre in Queens’ Long Island City: Corby Haas

[FREE] 6:30 pm: In this free show, audience members (signing in at 6) can join in with veteran improv talents to make up scenes on the spot: Magnet Mixer

7:00 pm ($5): A one-man show from comic Matthew Robert Gehring (member of sketch troupePolitical Subversions): #GenericWhiteGuy

[TOP PICK] 8:00 pm ($7): Some of the Magnet Theatre’s finest improvisors make up theatrical plays on the spot: Playhouse

8:00 pm ($5): Seth Kirschner (30 Rock, Lipstick Jungle) plays every character in a half-hour one-man TV episode parodying 90s sitcoms—and is debuting a new episode tonight—in Sertainly Seth; and in the other half of this double-bill, Paul Welsh performs a one-man show about a hall of portraits in Men in Paintings

8:00 pm ($5): “Best friends Dave Ahdoot and Ethan Fixell created an internet phenomenon by challenging pairs of women to double date them, and documenting the hilarious results for YouTubers everywhere. Two hundred dates later, their experiences were translated into reenactments, educational songs, and valuable lessons in everything from dancing to kissing. Tonight, these “dating experts” will improvise demonstrations inspired by audience participation, in an attempt to enlighten on the art of romance…and perhaps do a little bit of matchmaking along the way:” Dave and Ethan: Dating Coaches

8:00 pm ($5): Terrific sketch duo Skinny Bitch Jesus Meeting (Leah Rudick and Katie Hartman) host a comedy variety show, with tonight’s Desiree Burch, David Smithyman, Killy Dwyer, and Cocoon Central Dance Team performing at The PIT’s basement lounge: Daddy’s Basement: A Comedy Variety Freakshow

[$] 8:00 pm ($27.25 & 2-drink min.) A comic who’s performed on HBO’s Def Comedy Jam and Bad Boys of Comedy, Showtime at Harlem, BET’s ComicView, and the feature film Next Fridayheadlining tonight and Friday at the Carolines Comedy Club: Michael Blackson

[FREE] 9:00ish pm: Typically terrific NYC stand-ups performing on this weekly show at the Kabin Bar and Lounge hosted by Chesley Calloway and comedy genius Sean Patton: Comedy as a Second Language

[TOP PICK] 9:30 pm ($10): Top comics and comedic storytellers—who tonight are star insult comic Lisa Lampanelli, stunt journalist AJ Jacobs, and Emmy-winning Daily Show Supervising Producer Adam Lowitt—joining brilliant sketch comic and storyteller Kevin Allison (The State) to share tales on tonight’s theme “Met on the Net” at one of the finest storytelling shows in the country: Risk!

[TOP PICK] 9:30 pm (no cover, 1-item min.): Jessi Klein (fresh, unique, deliciously organic comic who’s one of the best stand-ups in the country; staff writer for Saturday Night Live; Comedy Central, VH1, NBC, CNN, Adult Swim), Mike Lawrence (shrewdly funny curmudgeon; Comedy Central), Sam Grittner (for stand-up about the gayness of Heaven, please click here), and Harry Terjanian (XM Radio) performing stand-up at Luca Lounge (222 Avenue B off 14th Street) for Sean Crespo’s & Carol Hartsell’s weekly comedy show Lasers in the Jungle

[TOP PICK] 9:30 pm ($5): The Emmy-winning writers of The Colbert Report gather on stage to perform an all-improvised show at Seize the Mustard

9:30 pm ($5): Improvisors (not announced) make up one-act plays on the spot at The PIT’s basement lounger for The Scene

[TOP PICK] 11:00 pm ($5): The highly talented Fran Gillespie, who came in as a solo improvisor, made the odd choice of requesting an audience member who had zero improv experience to come on stage and perform with her for her entire set—and then periodically scolded her new partner for making choices counter to improv rules that Fran explicitly requested the audience member not know… Spectacular musical improv troupe Diamond Lion (which includes improv genius Tara Copeland) ended up garnering nearly twice as many audience votes—and will be a champion that all subsequent opponents will find hard to beat. Tonight DL goes up against new UCBT Harold Night house troupe Mr. Crime, competing for audience laughs and votes at the raucous Cage Match

11:00 pm ($5): NYC stand-ups (not announced) performing at The PIT for this comedy club-style (i.e., long set) weekly show hosted by Harrison Greenbaum: The Big One

11:00 pm ($5): Magnet improv troupes Listen, Kid! and Upstate compete for audience laughs and votes—yes, like UCBT’s Cage Match, but with a game-like challenge component—at Inspirado

For full details, please visit HyReviews.com.

If you know anyone who might have a thyroid problem, please tell them about my new book: The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Thyroid Disease.